Rude Graffiti

Here are the major players over the coming weeks and months of 2011 as far as my running goes. The top shoe is some Nike Free’s. I’ve had these for about a year and a half, and am just beginning to put some mileage on them on a regular basis, mainly in an effort to prolong the life of my other running shoes. They are amazingly comfortable, and ideal for runs under 8 miles. Anything more than that and I really feel it the next day.

Next up are the Brooks Ravenna. These are the exact same shoes I wore during the Comrades Marathon in South Africa last year. I’d love for them to last forever because they have such memories attached to them. I may do something special with them when I finally retire them, not sure what yet though. I’m definitely open to ideas and suggestions. I still have to do something with many things that I have from my trip to South Africa. What an amazing adventure that was, and I wish I could go back with the team this year. Maybe one day…..

This next shoe is what I’m more excited about. The New Balance MT 101 are my new trail shoes! They are amazingly lightweight, while comfortable at the same time. I love the look and feel of these shoes, and in fact did a 5 miler this afternoon in them. They worked just fine on the roads, but I’m really looking forward to putting them to good use out on the trails. And at $65 on www.runningwarehouse.com you can’t go wrong! Probably a month and a half ago I came across an ultrarunner named Anton Krupicka. For some reason I had never heard of him, even though I’ve been into ultras for the past 2 years or so. After visiting his blog (antonkrupicka.blogspot.com), and realizing he is sponsored by New Balance, I began to check out their products. They’ve got some great things coming out this spring that I’m super pumped about, and hope to maybe add to my collection. In the meantime, there are my new favorite shoes.

The fourth and final shoe is the Nike Lunarswift. I got this shoe for two reasons. First of all they were extremely comfortable. Second, I’d say one of my strengths is that I’m able to run in almost any brand and type of shoe out there. Most people cannot say this. So, instead of being stuck with one type of shoe that works for me, I can adapt to anything on the market. So, I switch from time to time just to keep that ability, and maybe give my feet a little something different.

At this point in time, I’m still working on my running goals for 2011. A lot that is keeping me from doing that is my schedule and finances. I recently quite a job I held for 6 years and picked up 2 part time jobs. We’ve taken quite a cut in pay. I am much happier now though, and the loss in pay has been well worth it. We’ve cut back where we can, and that doesn’t leave a whole lot of room for extras. So, whatever races I end up doing this year will more than likely be local, unless we win the lottery (and we don’t play the lottery, so you figure it out). That’s cool though, because as I learned from my trip to South Africa, just being able to run and have running gear, let alone everything we need is a huge blessing. So no sweat off my back. I plan on doing a couple of shorter trail races, and would love to compete in the Howl at the Moon 8 hour trail ultra in Danville, IL once again this year. Last year I got 30 miles in 7 hours, but quit after that because of an injury. I’d love to do the entire 8 hours this year, and shoot for 45-50 miles. That definitely gives me something to shoot for. Maybe in 2012 I can travel and do either the Grand Island Trail Marathon or Dances with Dirt Trail Race somewhere.

So, that’s it for me. What are your plans for 2011? Doesn’t have to be about running, I’m just curious to hear what other people have planned.

I’ve been chewing on this passage of Scripture for about a week now, and it’s still got it’s tentacles in me!  Here is Matthew 6:24-33 in The Message.

“You can’t worship two gods at once.  Loving one god, you’ll end up hating the other.  Adoration of one feeds contempt for the other.  You can’t worship God and Money both.  If you decide for God, living a life of God-worship, it follows that you don’t fuss about what’s on the table at mealtimes or whether the clothes in your closet are in fashion.  There is far more to your life than the food you put in your stomach, more to your outer appearance than the clothes you hang on your body.  Look at the birds, free and unfettered, not tied down to a job description, careless in the care of God.  And you count far more to him than birds.  Has anyone by fussing in front of the mirror ever gotten taller by so much as an inch?  All this time and money wasted on fashion–do you think it makes that much difference?  Instead of looking at the fashions, walk out into the fields and look at the wildflowers.  They never primp or shop, but have you ever seen color and design quite like it?  The ten best-dressed men and women in the country look shabby alongside them.  If God gives such attention to the appearance of wildflowers–most of which are never even seen–don’t you think he’ll attend to you, take pride in you, do his best for you?  What I’m trying to do here is to get you to relax, to not be so preoccupied with getting, so you can respond to God’s giving.  People who don’t know God and the way he works fuss over these things, but you know both God and how he works.  Steep your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provision.  Don’t worry about missing out.  You’ll find all your everyday human concerns will be met.”

I’ve realized this morning I need to relax.  I want my mind to be focused on glorifying God with my actions, words, thoughts, etc.  No longer do I want my mind controlled by worrying and stressing about my needs, with getting.  I want to leave that in God’s hands, and respond appropriately when He gives out of His abundance!  Getting to this place is proving very difficult today.  Satan is really attacking.  Come Holy Spirit; help me to keep things in perspective.  Help me to remember Your goodness today.  Bring these verses to mind over and over  again.  Thank you for your presence!

“The point of your life is to point to Him.  Whatever you are doing, God wants to be glorified, because this whole thing is His.”  -Francis Chan, Crazy Love, pgs. 44-45

I read this tonight and it was like it stabbed me straight through the heart.  I mean, when was the last time I allowed my life to point to Christ?  Sure, maybe there have been little pieces here and there.  But by and large, I’ve been more concerned about myself than I have been about God being glorified.

“Worry implies that we don’t quite trust that God is big enough, powerful enough, or loving enough to take care of what’s happening in our lives.  Stress says that the things we are involved in are important enough to merit our impatience, our lack of grace toward others, or our tight grip of control.  Basically, these two behaviors communicate that it’s okay to sin and not trust God because the stuff in my life is somehow exceptional.  Both worry and stress reek of arrogance.  They declare our tendency to forget that we’ve been forgiven, that our lives here are brief, that we are headed to a place where we won’t be lonely, afraid, or hurt ever again, and that in the context of God’s strength, our problems are small, indeed.”  -Francis Chan, Crazy Love, pg. 42

This too, got my attention.  How much have I worried or stressed this past year, month, week, day, evening?  I mean, really, as much time as I’ve put into my life, you’d think the existence of Earth and everything on it was all about me!  And yet……..

As Chan goes on to write in chapter 2, we find throughout the Bible and life in general that it’s all about God.  We come and go; our lives but a vapor in the entirety known as time.  I was reminded this past weekend at church that Matthew 6 tells us that worrying does not add a single moment to our lives.  In other words, worry has never made any situation better.  In fact, we are promised in verse 33 that if we allow our lives to point to God (Seek the Kingdom of God above all else) He will provide what we need.  So the only question remaining is,

“Why don’t I trust Him?”

I mean, what’s it going to take?  When will my life point to Christ more than it does to me?  Lately I have made a focused effort not to worry and stress, but to simply present my requests to God, and then thank Him for all He’s done in my life.  and you know what?  I’ve noticed myself feeling much more peaceful, and positive as of late.  Now, the worry and stress have still been a struggle, and has shown me how I’ve allowed these bad habits to run rampant in my life.

The bottom line is that life has always been about God, and always will be.  When I take my focus off of Him and put it on my trials and troubles, I elevate those things above God in my life.  This is neither glorifying to Him, nor beneficial to me.  So, hopefully, today my life points a little more towards Christ than it did yesterday.  And tomorrow, it points a little more towards Christ than it did today.  And so on.

(Written on Friday, November 19, 2010)

It’s been an up and down week for me.  The first part of the week did not start out so well.  Some unmentionable circumstances have really put us in a bit of a bind, and I had some moments of weakness and panic.  And then, a few days later, something special happened.  I was reminded of Peter when he walked on water to Jesus.  The moment he took his eyes off of Jesus and focused on the waves, he began to sink.  Well, the moment I began to take my eyes off of my circumstances, and placed them instead on God, I immediately began to feel a sense of peace and calm wash over me.  God’s goodness, His perfect-ness, everything that He is, made whatever my problems were before fade to dust.  I mean, they’re still there, but how could I think about them when I was so wrapped up in how amazing my Father is?  SERIOUSLY!  God’s goodness is so much more powerful, energizing, FULFILLING, than any problem I’ve ever encountered in my life!  And yet, when I take my eyes off Him and focus on the issues at hand, I so easily forget that.  So, this morning, as I was thinking about this shift in thinking this week, my thoughts drifted to the two children we sponsor through World Vision, one of whom I met in person this summer.

Asiimwe.

Nomonde.

My struggles, my circumstances pale in comparison.  They would laugh at what I call a problem, stress, a concern.  I’ve seen Nomonde’s living conditions personally, and how easily I’ve forgotten what life is like for her.  I’ve taken my eyes off of what is truly important, God, and placed them on material idols.  I know this is the weekend before Thanksgiving, and it sounds so cliche to say I’m thankful for blah, blah, blah.  However, it is good to visit regularly the practice of giving thanks.  Instead of being thankful for material things this year, I think I will focus on more important matters.  I’m thankful for a wonderful family who loves me.  I’m thankful for the tremendous friendships I’ve developed over the years.  And I’m thankful for the opportunity to show God’s love to two young girls in Africa through World Vision.  I’m thankful for the opportunity to not only help them out, but that I got to visit Nomonde, I got to spend time with her, hug her, tell her I love her, and see firsthand how happy she is despite having very little.  I’m thankful that while I thought I was doing so much for these two children, I was being taught so many wondeful things.  I’m thankful I was able to take my eyes off of circumstances this week, and place them back where they belong……………on the love of my life, Jesus Christ.

I came across Romans 8:1-17 in my studies a couple weeks ago, and was particularly struck by verses 5-8.  I’ve been meaning to write my thoughts on this passage ever since, but also wanted to make sure I took some time simply to let those thoughts sink into my own heart.  Admittedly, not much time has been spent on this in these last few weeks, so tonight I decided it was time to give some much due attention to what God was showing me.  Maybe, in a way, He used this time to really single out one theme in particular that I really need to focus on, that being focused on God and not myself.  Here’s verses 5-8 out of The Message:

“Those who think they can do it on their own end up obsessed with measuring their own moral muscle but never get around to exercising it in real life.  Those who trust God’s action in them find that God’s Spirit is in them-living and breathing God!  Obsession with self in these matters is a dead end; attention to God leads us out into the open, into a spacious, free life.  Focusing on the self is the opposite of focusing on God.  Anyone completely absorbed in self ignores God, ends up thinking more about self than God.  That person ignores who God is and what he is doing.  And God isn’t pleased at being ignored.”

What truly caught me here, almost literally taking my breath away, was smack dab in the middle, “Focusing on the self is the opposite of focusing on God.“  I think sometimes I want to feel like I’ve contributed something to the wonderful gift God has given me in a deeply personal, everlasting relationship with Him.  Because of this flaw, I attempt too many things in my own power, failing to allow God to do His thing.  In essence, I act as if what Jesus did for us on the cross and in His life isn’t quite enough.  The humorous thing is that I act this way and then wonder what’s wrong when life doesn’t always work out as planned.  The other portion of these verses that really grabbed my heart was, “Anyone completely absorbed in self ignores God………and God isn’t pleased at being ignored.“  GULP!  All God wants is our trust, 100% of it!  Being self aware is great, and it’s good to do our part, but I think that all too often when I work to do my part I unintentionally remove God from the equation, thus turning away from the very help that God desires to provide.  I want more of God’s power in my life.  I want more of God’s love in my life.  I want more of God in my life period!  If that is to happen, I MUST learn to focus more on God and less on myself.  I must give Him room to show His power in my life, not limit it.  Will you help hold me accountable to this?  My desire is that my life would shout God all over the place, that things would happen with incredible regularity that are only explained by the Father being active in my life.  I need more of Him and less of me.  What about you?